Fixing Ain't Easy

            It was broken. It was haunted. Just like her.

            But it had bones, and it had memories, and it had the ability to be something strong again. Just like her.

- Fix You, by...Me

 

 





Writing the first ten chapters or so of a book feels like herding cats most of the time. I've learned, during editing, that what I thought was chaotic while writing isn't truly chaotic on paper. So I don't sweat the beginning-of-book jitters too much. So far, though, Jessica is proving to be the most prickly Walker and her story is the most challenging.

 

I've never considered myself a method writer, but talking through Fix You makes me think I might actually be one. Jessica's life gets turned upside down, and, hardass that she is, tackles her new life with teeth and claws. She takes on a massive project, and, as I'm writing, the story begins to feel like a massive project too. Jess's tired resolution about the house she's just bought is exactly how I'm looking at the book. As usual, the character is steering this ship and I'm just up in the crow's nest looking for icebergs.

 

Figuring out the source of my anxiety, though, is a blessing. If I've gone method with Jess, then hopefully "fixing" her will be an organic process. Aside from a few key scenes I have stamped in permanent ink, characters rarely take an exact path to the realizations at which I wanted them to arrive. It's a pattern of constant questions I ask them and myself, and usually, the twists I didn't plan for end up being more inspired than anything I could have planned in advance. Working through scenes like this - focusing on nuance and detail and approaching the moments like a movie director watching them unfold - save me a lot of second-guessing and revision when I edit. Everyone writes differently, but I think everyone has jitters...even if they don't always admit it.